Anniversaries are not so bad...

I could not let this day go by without paying tribute to my Dad. 9/11 meant a lot to my father & now it holds yet another Anniversary for our family, our father's death. Yes of all days to die on he died on "Patriot's Day". This anniversary sort of sneaked up on us. Life with four toddlers can be quite CRAZY so when I looked at the calendar a few days ago & saw it was almost 9/11. I realized it has been two years since he passed away! Two WILD, AMAZING, seemed short yet really LONG, sad & laughter filled years! WOW! AFTER he had his stroke I practically begged him to attend some sort of adult activity instead of sit at home in his wheelchair staring at the TV. He had certain shows that he would watch OVER & OVER again. Golden Girls, Little House on the Prairie, etc. I wanted him to get out amongst other people his age but NO he would have no part of it! He & practically half of my family fought me but in the end I prevailed & he started attending St Elizabeth Adult Day Care. For awhile now we mentioned going by St Elizabeth for a visit but it never came to fruition. My Mom & I decided today was going to be the day to visit this old haunt of his. It is this AWESOME place for seniors not far from my parents home. A bus would pick him up in the morning. He would do crafts, games, talk about current events. It was WONDERFUL! They even gave him a nickname, FPL Bob! {In Florida the power company is named FPL & they used to have a commercial with a man named Bob} He LOVED that! Once the babies were born he would go there with pictures & brag about them. My niece would say that Grandpa was at school because he rode a bus. Trust me those years after his stroke were HARD! I do not know how my mom handled him but she did. Luckily my father lived to see the first 7 months of our children's lives. They were his pride & joy. SO on the Second Anniversary of his death I knew I had to take them to see where Grandpa used to go. We talked about this the entire ride over there. The tribe exuded excitement. The sad part was that I think they really thought they were going to see their Grandpa instead of seeing where he USED to go. )= As we walked in the door the woman in charge said these must me Bob Mechtly's grandchildren! She remembered him & us! That made me happy! She even remembered how he did NOT want to go in the beginning but towards the end he wanted to go all the time! Yes that was my Dad! We brought them some medical items ie: Depends, bed liners, things they can always use. The tribe was on their BEST behavior, I was SO proud! We took a tour so the tribe could see where Grandpa used to go to "school". They even have some pet birds which the tribe flocked to! LOL!The place was decorated like a castle from the Renaissance era. SO beautiful! One of the women there decorates the place for each season. She takes whatever donated materials they get & hand paints them in a theme! AMAZING talent! She was already working on painting Gingerbread to turn the center into a Gingerbread House! TOO cool! As we left there we had such a good feeling! It seems that as more time goes on...

Anniversaries are not so bad!...

boo hoo moment...

The other night Michael & I decided to take our brood to the mall for dinner & some shopping. Another PLUS to this excursion was that we did not have "clean up" duty after dinner, YAY!(The little things that will make us happy! ha!). Lately Florida has been having some WEIRD weather, ok not weird, it's been down right COLD! We were not prepared & were in dire need of some cold weather clothes! We seem to have plenty of sundresses & shorts but NO long sleeve tops. So we needed to hit the stores for some sales! We actually found a few necessities that we desperately needed. Remember we live in Florida where it is suppose to be warm 365 days a year! I am a native Floridian & I LOVE the heat! LOL! The kiddos were VERY good especially since we had them out past their bedtime. On the car ride to Grandma's house we turned the radio up so they would sing, dance & mostly stay awake. There's nothing worse than waking a sleeping baby! The babies LOVED it! We were dancing in our seats & probably looked very "KOOKY" to every other car on the road! To each their own! ha! Then this song came on the radio, you know the song from "An Officer and a Gentlemen", the one Joe Cocker sings when Richard Gere carries Debra Winger out of the factory. I LOVE that song, anyhow, Brendan starts saying something & I do not quite understand him. He repeats himself a few times until I FINALLY get that he is saying "Grandpa". Once he saw that I knew what he was saying he then pointed to his heart. (I tell them ALL the time that Grandpa is in their heart). I then started paying attention to the words of the song. "Love lift us up where we belong, where the Eagles fly...". It's funny how he associated this song with Grandpa. Especially since it mentions eagles. My father LOVED eagles! He had a HUGE collection that we still have. He was letting me know that Grandpa was there! I started crying. Now some people will say that he is ONLY 2, how could he possibly know this. I truly believe my father was there in that moment. This was definitely a...

boo hoo moment...

making peace with the past...

One year ago today my father passed away. He had a stroke in March of 2001, was partially paralyzed and basically was not a happy person for quite a long time. Don't get me wrong, he had a lot of life left in him but he just gave up the fight. In fact he had told us for YEARS that he wished that the good Lord would take him & he finally did on 9/11/07. I wanted my Dad to be around for his children but mostly his grandchildren, my children. He did not even get to know them yet. I did not even have picture's of him with them. That was a VERY selfish reason for me to think of before he died. The last few years he made all of our lives very difficult. My Mom was his care taker & had it the worst. Her own health deterorated due to taking care of him. Someone once told me to not do a thing for him so he could do for himself first. Well, that flew out the window the first week he was home. From time to time I think back to the type of relationship I had with my Dad. It was one WILD ride, some moments of smooth sailing but definitely some turbulance. LOL! When I was little I looked up to my Dad, I remember holding his hand as we would walk down the street. It was not until I hit puberty that things became difficult. I started to have a voice and an opinion that was not always his. We had a challenging relationship to say the least. We both spoke our minds and were stubborn. It must be a German thing! ha! The sad part is that my father rarely ever gave me a compliment. (Dad's need to compliment their daughters! I tell Michael this all the time now that he has three of them!) Even during my pregnancy with these four beautiful babies he would often be the critic. He would say "You act like you are the first woman to give birth to four babies at once!". I was the first woman I knew to do it! LOL! This played out a lot in my relationships with men. I had a hard time taking compliments from anyone and I still do! I continue to THANK Michael each day for sticking with me & showing me that not all men are like my Dad! I definitely did not marry my father! LOL! There were many times that I wished my Dad would be like my friends father's but that was not him. He would tell it like it was, and that was that. Many people could not handle his candor. In hindsight that is one thing that that I valued from him, his honesty. He was an HONEST man. He might have had many faults but he did not lie to you. I have way too many people that tell you what they think you want to hear instead of the truth. My Dad would do ANYTHING for anyone. One time he brought home a customer's dog because they had no one to watch him when they went out of town. This dog was MEAN! My Dad did not care, he was helping someone. Just one of the many things he would do for someone else. No matter how difficult our relationship was he was still my Dad & I loved him. My father was quite the patriotic man. He had an eagle collection that most would envy. He LOVED the military & anything patriotic. His own father died on the 4th of July. That is why it is amazing that he died on 9/11, Patriot's Day! I think he planned it that way! It AMAZES me how my father has touched other people. My sister in law Laurie's, aka "Aunt Larry" (It's a LONG story), parents Dorsey & Eleanor LOVED my Dad. They gave me a beautiful plaque with a picture of my Dad on it which hangs in our living room. Dorsey is quite the character & had them ingrave aka Spencer Tracy on the plaque. He thought my Dad reminded him of him. My Dad LOVED that! It was SO sweet of them to remember him! The babies now go over to that plaque & point to it when I ask them where Grandpa is. Well, they either point to the plague on the wall, up in the air to say he is in heaven or better yet to their hearts. I always's point to their hearts & tell them that he is in there. I FINALLY taught them something! YAY! So much has gone on over the past year. These children have grown up SO much. They really need their Grandpa, I need my Dad. But that is not to be. It is hard to believe that he is really gone & will not see them grow up! That part hurt the most when he died. You see my fathers father died many years before I was ever born. So I know what it was like to not have a grandfather. I really hope that my Dad is watching us from above. I hope he wishes he had a few more years with them & us. You can never change the past just learn from it & look to the future. So on Patriots Day of all day's I am...

making peace with the past....

yesterday....

OK, I forgot to add to their blog yesterday & wish all the Grandma's & Grandpa's a "Happy Grandparents Day". Yes, Yesterday was "their" day! I had all intentions to get my act together & give all their grandparents a little something from the babe's BUT time escaped me & I am giftless writing a belated post. OOPS! Maybe I will make today honorary Grandparents day & do something special today! Not a day goes by that we do not think of Grandma M aka "Grammy", Nana, Papa Bill, Grandpa Buck & lest us not forget Grandpa M in heaven. I cannot believe that it will be a year this week that the good Lord took him from us! If you ask the babies where he is they will either point up to the sky or better yet their chest to say that he is in their heart. It is my hope that they never forget the short time they had with him! It is weird how the circle of life works. My Grandfather on my Dad's side died when my oldest brother Jim was 7 months old. My Dad was his "baby". So he lived to see his baby have his first baby. Now fast forward 49 years and my Dad lived to see his baby, me, have my first baby well we all know it's babies but you get the drift. My children were 8 months old when he died. TOO weird! I cannot believe he is gone. I think he watches them from above & is proud of them & me. I hope!! SO, to all you grandparents I hope that you had a VERY special day...

yesterday....